Wednesday, February 18, 2009

they needed me...

this morning my phone rang at 845 and since my hubby was home - I slept on!! then it rang again at 915 and i heard the tail end of a conversation which made me holler down at my hubby...who was it??? well - it was my work (both times) calling to see if I could come in for a couple hours and help out this morning. my first reaction was anger at my hubby - why didn't you come wake me up the first time and tell me? I was upset for a brief moment and then I realized - I dont want to go to work today or any other day so why I am getting angry at my hubby??? They Needed Me - little ol ME was needed - not wanted NEEDED and boy did it feel good! They werent whining or fussing at me because they wanted me to do somehting for them - they genuinely wanted me to come to work becasue they Needed ME!!
I think working has taken away some of my Joy at being home with my family and I dont like it! At work I get compliments, I laugh & smile almost the whole time I am there, there is a whole lot of satisfaction in a job well done with lots of OCD elements on the side and I am good at it!
Dont get me wrong - I am a happy person almost all the time but there are no instant rewards in being a mom & teacher and I have gotten used to that instant gratification of things at work and it is making it harder to not expect it and have higher expectations of my kids at home. It took a long time for me to get to this place of joy and contentment and it is scary to me how something so trivial can change my outlook!! Now - I do realize I have to have let this happen so something is not right and what does it boil down to - as always - my relationship/walk with the Lord! At least that is my take on it!!!
It was nice to be Needed for ME today!!!

1 comment:

  1. Just think, if you had went to work you wouldn't have gotten to play with your new computer! LOL! And btw, it is nice to feel needed sometimes by people other than your immediately family.